Saturday, July 23, 2011
You know the way I was bragging about packing a suitcase for a month that weighed, like, 750 grams. Well I spoke too soon!
The problem was that I weighed it too early in the week. When I discovered that I actually had 13kgs to play around with, I lost the run of myself.
“Oh, I’ll just pop in this second pair of black shoes. I might need them.”
“This bag doesn’t actually go with anything in my case but I’ll bring it anyway.”
“I’ll bring this kitchen sink just in case the one there isn’t working.”
As a result both my big case and carry-on case were heavier than I had anticipated.
I arrived at the airport in plenty of time. In fact I might have been first there as the check-in crew were sitting twiddling their thumbs. I made straight for a cute looking guy.
Experience has taught me that women check-in'ers can be bitches and won’t let you away as much as a gram.
“’Ello”, he purred. “ ‘Ow many bags?”
He really did have a French accent. That’s not my typing!
“One carry-on and one to check –in”.
“And did you pack zem yourself?”
No, my butler did it
“Yes I did.”
“Can you place the carry-on one on the belt to weigh it first?”
“Oh dear. It iz very heavy, 12kg. You are only allowed 8”.
I launched into my helpless female act.
“8!. I thought it was 10. And I have my laptop in it.
“Oh we allow 2kgs for a laptop. Is yours a big one?”
“Huge. It’s practically a fully-fledged computer”.
“Well take it out and I vill veigh your bag again.”
I promptly did so, the bag weighed 8.3kgs and he let me off with that. I then took my bag and put the laptop back into it. So what was the point of all that?
The other case was 29.3kgs! How did that happen in a few days? But it was still under the limit…..just about.
Off I toddled around Duty-Free until boarding time. As I approached the desk I could see a very irate woman and an equally hassled crew member. She was trying frantically to squash a HUGE bag into the little container for checking to see if it is the right size for the cabin. It reminded me of trying to get into my jeans.It hadn’t a hope of fitting!
He was exasperated.
“But Madam, even if it does fit, it is 13kgs. You also have a laptop, a large handbag and two bags of Duty-Free. You are way over the limit.
“But I must bring them,” she shouted at him .
Oh don’t do that Missus. Whatever hope you have if you butter him up, you have none if you make him angrier!
“You can either remove some items, pay the excess baggage or not go on the flight”, he announced.
Them’s not very good options!
“Anyway, you are only allowed one piece of hand-luggage.
You could hear an audible gasp of horror from everyone in the queue including myself. I looked at my case, handbag and duty-free. Oops.
Just then I espied my nice Mr. Frenchman at the other boarding desk and made a beeline for him.
Well if he let me get this far, he can’t stop me now.
I smiled sweetly, handed over my card and walked on. Success!
After planes, trains and automobiles (almost) I arrived at the apartment at 2am. Finian and Marese were waiting for me. I dropped the bags on the floor and Marese uttered the immortal words
“Do you want to pop down to Foleys for one?”
Is the Pope a Catholic?
We were there in a matter of minutes. Hugs and kisses all around. We then got catching up on the news of the week. One drink turned into two, into three.
We sauntered back up the road at 5 am! The sun was up and the crickets were chirping.
God, how am I going to cope with a month of this????