Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Phantom of the Soap Opera

Marese was worried about Daisy the dog, as she was acting out of sorts.
Personally I don't know how she could tell. Anyone who has ever met her would immediately see that she is bipolar.
I'm talking about Daisy, not Marese!
One day you go into the house and Daisy rushes over with a sock in her mouth and insists in a game of "Try to pull the sock out of my mouth while I nip your hand". Then the next time you go in, she will start growling as soon as you enter the gate, and not stop til you leave.
But now she was acting even more strangely. She had put up weight, was ripping up the blankets in her basket and was even wetting her basket. All things she had never done before. Marese hauled her off to the vet, thinking she had a kidney infection.
The vet listened carefully and then pronounced
"She has all the classic symptoms of a phantom pregnancy!"
It sounded absolutely ridiculous....until I heard the explanation.
Daisy had put up weight as she was actually producing milk. She was wetting her basket as she was pushing as if she was in labour. She was ripping her blankets as she was trying to huddle them around her to suckle them.
But the remedy that was prescribed for her takes the dog biscuit.
Valium! I kid you not.
Our dog is on valium!!!
The Simpsons are the most dysfunctional family I know.....and yet their dog is not reduced to sedatives!

What does that say about our family???