Tuesday, February 15, 2011


I have just discovered that I am suffering from anthropomorphism. Before you recoil in horror, fearing that it is contagious, let me explain what it is. It means that I am guilty of giving human characteristics to an inanimate object- I have given my car a name! Fortunately I am not alone. It seems that a quarter of all car owners have attributed a gender and a name to their automobile.
Studies have been carried out in this area.
Some faculty had far too much time and money on its hands.
It seems that because cars move we tend to think of them as animate. But according to this assumption we should also bond with our vacuum cleaner.
Somehow I can never hear myself uttering the words "Must get this place spick and span. I'll just get Sucky out of the cupboard!"
When I first went to collect my newly purchased car I saw her taking pride of place out on the garage forecourt. Her red body work gleamed in the sun, topped off by her black softtop. I knew in an instant that she was a Roxy!

Many mothers have claimed that they don't choose a name for their baby until it is actually born as they need to see if the name will suit. I know exactly what they mean!!!
Roxy and I share a lot of time together. We clock up over 2000km a month. Roxy houses my office, my spare wardrobe and a host of other things. She occupies an important part in my life. She is "alive".
I am not the only one who thinks this. Many people have said to me
"I saw Roxy going through town the other day."
Hell-o! I know. I was there as well. You hardly think she sneeked out of the house unknowns to me, like a wayward teenager.One day I was driving through Rooskey in Co.Leitrim. I got a text from a friend which read
"Hi there. If you ever want to have an affair I'll loan you my car. You'll never get away with it otherwise!"
Roxy and I have had many adventures together. This weekend saw us seperated for the first time. I left her outside her Auntie Anne's house while I skidaddled into Dublin in search of Frenchmen! When I returned on Sunday evening I got in and turned the key. Roxy spluttered and coughed.......and cut out! I was in shock. This was the first time anything like this ever happened. Even during the arctic conditions of this winter, Roxy braved the cold and purred into life every morning. So why fail me now?
I am convinced it was because she was in a huff. She had said to herself
Hmm. Don't think you can just feck off for an adventure without me and expect me to be here for you when you decide to come back. Let's show you what it would be like to be without me. SO THERE!
Roxy sprung into action on the second turning of the key and hasn't given an ounce of trouble since.
I've learned my lesson!

1 comment: