I HATE BIRDS!
Their little beady eyes make my skin crawl. Their pointy beaks make my blood run cold. Their feathers make me queasy. They don't even have to be real birds. My mother loves to recount the story (usually at the most inopportune moment) about how she had to remove the robin figures fron the Christmas wreaths when I was a child.
Yesterday evening I was driving home when I espied a brown feathered object flying in the direction of my windscreen. It was only when I heard the thud and opened my eyes that I realised...
I HAD CLOSED MY EYES IN THE FIRST PLACE AND I WAS DRIVING!
How could I have been so stupid? But it was a completely reflex reaction. Luckily I was driving on a country road so there was no other traffic. I was unhurt, which is more than I can say for the bird. When I looked in my rear view mirror I could see a solitary feather floating in the breeze.
I am a caring person, honest. I once cried when I caught a mouse in a trap.
Actually I apologised to the poor little critter!
But I can't feel sorry for a bird, no matter how hard I try. I bet Alfred Hitchcock could have made a pretty good sequel based on my phobia.